Some Nigerians have called for patience and understanding among couples to avoid abuse and divorce in marriages.

Across section of Nigerians, who spoke  on Thursday, said that the call was necessary in order to stop continuous domestic violence and divorce in some marriages.

A retired civil servant, Mr Jonh Ajuzie, advised women in abusive marriages to remain, if they could manage it and pray to God concerning the problem instead of divorce.

Ajuzie said that abuses and divorces could occur in a home due to lack of patience, respect and understanding among the couples.

He said that wife submission to her husband should not be abused by her husband “unless the husband is mad’’.

“Women are the cause of abuse and divorce in some cases in many homes today because they drag authority with their husbands due to the level of education they have acquired.

“I urge women, who are in abusive marriages to remain there, pray to God, the founder of marriage instead of divorce.”

Ajuzie said that why the marriages of older women last longer than that of the younger ones, was that women of olden days reverence their husbands “and treat them like kings”.

He also urged married couples not to invite third party in their homes rather pray to God, the author of marriage and to forgive each other rather than resort to divorce.

A food seller, Mrs Jennifer Okonkwo, urged a wife in abusive marriage to go for divorce because Bible did not say men should beat their wives rather men should love their wives.

“I urge women who are in abusive marriages to go for divorce because Bible didn’t say men should beat their wives rather men should love their wives as Christ loves the church.

“A woman needs not to die in a marriage just to save the marriage; the worst that can happen is that they can separate for a while and see if they can sort things out, if not they can go there different ways,’’ Okonkwo said.

Ms Nike Erinle, a Filmmaker advised couples to endure whatever they might be going through in their marriages in as much as their emotional and mental health was not at risk.

Erinle said this was because “marriage is all about two imperfect individuals coming together from different backgrounds; so with this understanding, both parties must create room for forgiveness at all times.’’

According to her, the biblical precept of marriage should be adhered to.

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“Marriage is worth giving one’s all but not losing one’s life over.

“I believe entertainment is a strong outlet to pass across messages and films are powerful tools to correct societal ills.

“I know my film will speak to the problems of lots of marriages and mend them,” Erinle, who is making a film on marriage said.

A marriage counselor, Mr Johnson Amah said that he would not encourage abuse and divorce in any home rather the woman should play the fool and remain in such a marriage.

“I don’t celebrate abuse; some are prompted by women; in such a case, let them play the fool and remain.’’

Amah said that the only time he would encourage divorce in abusive marriage was when the situation “is an obvious threat to the life of the woman and the man is a sadist.’’

“I will only encourage divorce in a situation that is glaring and vivid, the man is a sadist; yes, both couples should go for divorce.”

A meat seller, Mrs Susan Orangande said that she did not encourage divorce in any marriage rather couples should understand themselves because as “it takes two to tangle’’.

“I don’t encourage a man to divorce his wife but they should understand each other and also learn from each other because it takes two to tangle.”

Orangande also urged women to love, respect, and be submissive to their husbands “no matter how small they are because lack of love and respect can lead to abuse and divorce.

“I will advise women to love, respect and submit to their husbands no matter how small they are in order to avoid abuse and divorce in a home.”

A provision seller, Paschal Ibeawuchi, advised couples in abusive marriages should not to divorce rather they should present it to God and who would intervene and bring solution.

Ibeawuchi said that lack of understanding, lack of tolerance, impatience and lack of forgiveness, if not handled in time could escalate and lead to abuse and divorce.

“This starts little and if it is not handled in time might lead to abuse and divorce.”

He encouraged couples in abusive marriages to seek the face of God instead of going for divorce.

A groundnut seller, James Obasi said that abuse and divorce can only be caused by women who lack home training and quality character.

“The only thing that can cause abuse and divorce in a home is lack of home training and quality character from the women.”

Obasi urged couples in abusive marriages not to go for divorce because “it is not God’s will for marriage rather they should seek God’s face concerning their marriage.